stumbling block

I grabbed my notebook, found my black and blue pen, pulled up today’s Daughter of the King devotional, and opened my YouVersion Bible app. As I began to stare at the words on my phone screen, I knew that I couldn’t read my devotional this morning. Something in my spirit wasn’t right, and I knew what it was: I offended my mom two days ago and the vibe between us had been off ever since. I needed to go reconcile with her before I could really spend some time reflecting on God’s word and speaking to Him.

Matthew 5:23, 24 NLT
23 “So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, 24 leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God.

I sat there for a minute just thinking. I knew that my mom was probably reading her Bible and for a second I thought, “Maybe I shouldn’t interrupt her. I’ll just wait for a little bit.” But honestly, I couldn’t. So I went upstairs and cracked her door open, and as I suspected she was reading her Bible. She told me to come in and asked me what was up. We talked and then sung a song and prayed together. Then I was free to engage in my devotional.

The thing about all of this is at the time that I offended her, I felt like she was being completely inconsiderate. I had come home from work; I was tired and hungry. Instead of letting me get myself together, she was asking me to do things for an event she has coming up that is an extremely significant milestone in her life. It doesn’t matter if I felt like she was being inconsiderate or not, I should not have responded to her the way I did. I made her feel like her requests for my help were an annoyance and that I viewed this milestone as insignificant in my sight. So naturally she felt as though she couldn’t depend on me as her daughter to aid her with preparations. That is not what I intended to do, but that was the result of my response, nonetheless.

God has pulled me a mighty long way from how I used to respond to my emotions, but I still have a ways to go. So my prayer this morning consisted of not only confessing and asking for forgiveness, but asking God to work in me this sense.

Despite any circumstance, my emotions do not warrant a reaction.

Emotional intelligence is crucial. I find it easier for me to exercise emotional intelligence with those who are not a part of my household than those who are, and this is just an indication of what I need to work on. By work on I mean studying what God’s word has to say about emotions and dealing with relationships, meditating on it, and having an increased sensitivity to this area in my life. I believe that this is a significant part of my spiritual journey at this time.

With all of that being said, transparency brings about intimacy. Our journeys are all different, but we can learn from one another and encourage one another throughout it.

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